I already feel sorry for this kid‘s future children.
He’ll be one of those fathers who always has to top his kids’ whines with his own stories of woe from when he was a kid. It reminds me of Bill Cosby’s routine; the one where he talks about his Dad: “If I asked the man for a quarter, he’d tell me how he once killed a grizzly bear with his looseleaf notebook.”
Now this new kid… he’s going to be so hard on his young kids! If they’re just sitting around, playing and being three years old, he’s going to get drunk and yell at them:
“Ahh, come on, you layabouts! When I was your age, I survived alone in the wilderness for two whole DAYS. And I did it with no pants on. Wild stray dogs tried to eat me and everything!”
(Like how I am automatically assuming that he’s going to grow up to have a drinking problem?) 🙂