Warning: Gross post ahead

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As you know by now, I largely use this blog as a dumping ground for my thoughts– it’s pretty much my diary. (Hence, the title.) It’s also why I tend to keep this URL on the downlow, and only shared it with people I know and trust. I know I’ve picked up a couple other readers over the years, too, and that’s fine… but overall, these are the things that I think about but are a little too personal or weird to go up on The Face-Book(TM).

Stop reading now if you get seriously grossed out by bloody things.

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Yesterday while I was in the shower shaving my legs, I accidentally cut off a mole on my thigh.

(ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!)

I didn’t even realize I did it at first, which is the strange part. I didn’t feel it. But once I turned the water off, a spot on my leg was bleeding pretty badly. It was a spot where I’ve had this little red mole for years now.

I’ve always wondered about that mole. Like I said, it was bright red. It never grew or changed color as far as I could tell, so I figured it was just some strange little thing and left it alone. When it first appeared, I did squeeze it and poke at it because I thought it was a blood blister or something. But it’s right on the front of my thigh, not a spot that gets a lot of friction or anything, so it’s always been odd.

Now, it’s gone. It’s still red there, all right, though. I took the Band-Aid off this morning and it’s still bleeding pretty hard a full 24 hours later. I’m kind of stunned at how MUCH it’s bleeding, to be honest. I’ve had to change the bandage at work already today because I could just kind of tell it was seeping. That’s why I wore black pants today, just in case.

Isn’t this gross, though? The very idea of shaving off a mole is horrible. I’m so squicked out by this.

But now, because it’s bleeding so much (more than yesterday? That doesn’t make much sense, does it?) I should probably go see a doctor. Maybe I should have gone awhile ago to make sure it wasn’t a funky lil’ melanoma or something, but now’s a good a time as any, I guess, to get it checked out. I don’t know if they can put a stitch or two in there to close it up, or just, I don’t know, burn it closed or something, but it does seem to need help in the scabbing-over department.

I’ve never been to a dermatologist. If I go, I will probably bring up my hypertrophic scarring thing, too, and ask about my tattoo. A few people have told me my tattoo looks “weird” because it’s not flat. It’s just a tad raised up, and I think it’s directly because I tend to scar that way, and my skin did reject a lot of the ink the first time I got it done (I had to go back TWICE to get color put back in). I want to ask if I should just consider getting the whole thing removed or is it OK to get it covered up? I’ve wondered about this for awhile now, but it’s never been enough of an issue to warrant finding a dermatologist and going and all of that. So maybe I can tack that on to the sliced-off mole issue.

Oooh, oooh, I have one more gross thing to tell you about before I wrap up this particular post: The other night I was putting socks away in my dresser, and I have these little box/compartment separators in the drawer to organize socks by athletic, work, no-show or winter socks, and the one with athletic socks is stuffed to capacity. I was trying to stuff one more pair into the box when something very sharp slid up and under my fingernail, on the side between the nail and the cuticle.

I pull my hand up and there is a sewing needle stuck in my fingernail. I’m serious. It was under there, half under the nail bed and half in my cuticle. OMG WTF!! But before I pulled the needle out, I almost got my camera to document it because it was really, really gross and I was fascinated at the same time I was cursing from the pain. I ended up pulling the needle out fast and soaked my finger in a little cup filled with hydrogen peroxide. It hurt pretty bad for awhile but it did stop bleeding pretty quick. Today, there is a little dark scab-thing under the nail, and I guess I just have to wait for it to grow out.
So freaky, right?

Oh, and I realized the needle came from this small traveler’s sewing kit that I’d mindlessly shoved into the side of that box, thinking, I guess, that sewing kits belong with socks…? Either way, it had popped open and that’s how I got stabbed with the needle.

Good thing I had a tetanus shot a few years ago, when that shopping cart rolled into my hand at IKEA and tore the skin off my middle finger on my left hand. That was another bizarre injury.

But NONE of this is as bad as the time I actually sliced my fingernail OFF while shaving in the bathtub. My nails were all soft from being in the water, and I was shaving with my left hand and just nicked the crap out of one of my right fingernails. That was the absolute grossest injury I’ve ever had. Even grosser than the broken wrist, I think.

 

Yay! Injuries! What’s a really gross injury you’ve had? I wish I wasn’t interested in gross stuff, but I totally am. Yeah. I’m weird.

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8 responses »

  1. I have had so many gross injuries but I can’t even think of any right now because I’m loving yours. I am also simultaneously skeeved and enthralled by such tales. I do remember one time pulling a skin tag off. It was bugging me and I just pulled and pulled and pulled until it came free. And then there was the strange red bump I had behind my knee when I was a teenager. I pushed and prodded because I was sure it was a pimple and it turned out to be a totally long ingrown hair and after about an hour of pushing and squeezing out came this ball of tightly wound hair and all this pus and I had a crater about the size of a pencil eraser behind my knee for the rest of the summer. Or the time I decided I was going to dig a wart out of my hand on my own and ended up ripping it out by my teeth, cone and all. Was my one and only wart to date. Come to think of it, I was a pretty disgusting child…

    P.S. Once again I can’t remember the password for your secure posts. Can you FB message it to me. I’m so sorry I keep forgetting. 😦

  2. Ewww! Eww! AWESOME!

    I kind of wish for one of those spiral-y ingrown hairs, since I think those are just cool. It’s incredible what the body will do. The fact that the hair keeps growing even though it’s not breaking the surface is really amazing.

    I did have a spiral-y hair situation once, though! I got a piercing in my upper ear, and I was constantly spinning the earring after it was done because it was really slow to heal. One night I took the earring out and one of my hairs had wrapped around the post, and I had to pull the hair out of the piercing hole. It was so cool and gross! No wonder it was slow to heal. (It turned out that I developed a keloid from that piercing since it was right between cartilage and loose skin. I had to let it close. But I still have the keloid on my ear.)

  3. I can’t remember that password, either.

    Moles bleed like stink! (I love that phrase!) Whether they’ve been shaved over or picked at, they bleed a lot. And my mom always had a red mole or two- I found them fascinating when I was a kid. Go figure I have a couple of my own, now. Yours is probably fine, but they take a long time to scab over and heal, and any time they are disturbed the bleeding starts all over again. It might be worth getting a stitch or two put in, in that regard. It just depends on whether or not the bleeding has stopped yet and if you’re able to keep it protected in the meantime.

  4. Today, the bleeding has stopped, unless I disturb it by removing the band-aid. But it’s MUCH better now. Also, my friend Dot shared a wikipedia link that explained what this little mole really was: A cherry hermangioma. It’s basically a little cluster of capillaries near the skin. Harmless. All the capillaries explain why it bleeds so much when they get cut. Ah HA! Mystery all but solved in my mind. 🙂

  5. I can’t really think of any gross injuries… I guess maybe the time I cut a dime-sized chunk of flesh out of my calf while shaving- for some reason I decided to flick away water dripping off my wrist while stroking upward with the razor, resulting in carving a nice, deep circle into myself. Frightening, and the bitch took FOR-EV-VER to heal. Or the time I slipped on some mossy rocks while boarding a jet ski and cut the baby toe side of my foot. I didn’t think anything of it til weeks later it still hadn’t healed. My grandma was visiting and suggested I soak it in hot water and then have my mom try to express any fluid/infection/moss particles/whatever. I soaked it. Mom lanced it, and then began to squeeze out pus as I turned my head away and grimaced from the pain. Mom couldn’t believe I wasn’t screaming and Grandma said I was as pale as a ghost. We had to repeat that process quite a few times over the next several days, but it seemed to do the trick. Then there was the time when I was a kid and we were camping and I stepped on a soda can tab some asshole had left in the lake. Sliced my heel open. I had to sit in a lawn chair while my dad flushed the cut out with the water hose (spray nozzle and all). Some friends were visiting and their mom was a nurse. She stood by, observing, and musing about how calm I was. That thing hurt for months. Any time I would land on my heel wrong it would feel like there was something sharp in there, jabbing around. I can remember playing running games at church and suddenly stopping short, shrieking from the pain of mis-stepping on it.

    I gotta start avoiding the combination of water and sharp things, obviously. I never considered those instances together, until now. And I gave them to you in reverse chronological order. What’s up with that?

  6. I totally remember you telling that story about your piercing. My husband calls those epic ingrown hairs “spiders.” But GAAAAAH, my hand is hurting just thinking about that sewing needle. I am SO glad, though, that I’m not the only one whose thought upon getting injured is “I must get pictures of this! Surely everyone will want to see!” The nastiest thing that ever happened to me, nail-wise, is when I was struggling to get my cousin’s stroller open and I ended up crushing my finger in between the little mechanisms that snap into place. That shit HURT. My nail didn’t come off, even though it cracked clean through (I have freakishly tough nails), but I did have a little kaleidoscope of bruises going on under my nailbed for a while.

  7. OUCH, Jen! So, your injury progressed to Level: Pus. Yeeesh! But still, it’s good that you got this story out of it, because that’s a good one. But yes, stop walking in water around sharp stuff. Actually, that’s good advice for all of us. 🙂

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