Oh dear GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD, I can’t listen to this person talk another damn minute!!!!
I sit near someone with a patronizing phone voice and right now she is training an intern or part-time person to help her with her job, and OMG. It’s worse than ever. The tone, the way she is “quizzing” the person about “now, what do you do when THIS happens?” is just killing me. I want to thump her with a rolling pin. Or throw a black trash bag over her head and tie it off with my belt.
There’s just so much you can listen to without feeling a little murderous. It’s a fact of life. Everyone has something–some SOUND–that goes right to the deepest part of their cerebral cortex and triggers things like that uncontrollable eyelid twitch, shaking hands that keep reaching for the scissors, grinding teeth, internal screaming and cursing through pursed lips… you know what I’m talking about.
She sounds like that woman in Office Space… the one that repeatedly answers the phone in that annoying, chirpy voice… “Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking…JUST a moMENT! (pause) Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking…JUST a moMENT!” Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Thank God for Pandora today. Oh, man. My salvation. The only problem is I can still hear her in the background. But classical music in particular acts as a white noise to help drown her out. I have too much work to do today to be annoyed by this shit! Pray for me, and pray I don’t get stabby. I don’t want to go to prison.